you tried and failed

you offered me a rope up,
your condescending smirk anchoring me to the spot.

i batted it away.

you dropped down praise from the sky,
waiting for me to lap up the false words like a dog.

i let it sink into the ground.

you showered me with gifts,
your money flying in five hundred different directions.

i gave them away.

because you with your magnanimous posture and your upturned lips looked down at me like a charity case.

you were too late.

i had already dug myself up from my self-imposed hole, my nails bleeding, my wrists broken, my lips chapped.

but i was alive and breathing.

and you were just standing over there, with the cameras flashing behind you, trying to save a person who had already saved herself.

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