unrequited

it was true love at the first sight.
(unrequited true love)

i saw him. his face. the contours of his cheekbones.
the way the sunlight played on his eyes (beautiful eyes – ocean blue)

he did not see me. his right hand was occupied. he was laughing.
he smiled at the girl next to him, and i could see the love

i watched him from afar everyday. saw his smiles. saw his tears. saw his frowns.
i vowed to hurt anyone and everyone who hurt him. i don’t know who hurt him.

somedays, when i served him coffee, he would look at me with a strange expression.
is this love?

other days, he was distracted. on his phone. with his girlfriend – Primrose.
i am not as beautiful, nor as pretty. but i love him.

i fell hard and fast.
the way his lithe fingers tapped on his phone, his fluttering eyelashes, his smiles, his dimples

one day, he didn’t come in.
an empty space in my heart. it hurt so much

the next day, he wasn’t there either.
breaking news! car crash off of Petunia and Brimstone. one casualty.

they showed his girlfriend crying. his parents crying. his relatives crying.
they all said beautiful boy wonderful man

his funeral was on the 31st of October. i went.
primrose with her prim and proper self was bawling. i was crying too. if she saw me, she didn’t say anything. i didn’t say anything either.

i still dream of him sometimes. and i wonder how things would have turned out if i had noticed that he was upset when he left the coffee shop. if i had caught the tears and told him not to drive home.

primrose left the town. i stayed.

and i still mourn.

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