drowning

the water is smothering me.

I smile, wondering at the foreign feeling on my face. The numbness helps, I decide, as I laugh off their perfect sharp jokes flying towards me, creating a shield of apathy.

am i drowning?

The chocolate melts on my mouth, but I can’t bring myself to care too much about the lingering sweetness. The air seems to be toxic around me – or perhaps it is the infernal chocolate in my hand – because no one comes near me.

help, please, i beg of you.

My mother barely spares me a glance as I hesitate in the doorway.

“Hello,” I call out weakly.

There is no answer, but I wait one more moment, hoping, praying. But she does not look up, her fingers flying across the keyboard. So I drag myself away, up the stairs, into my room, and lock the door.

i can’t breathe.

Everything is numb. It feels nice. Darkness swirls at the edge of my vision. Perhaps that is my imagination. I can see Death – a beautiful man cloaked in gracefully writhing shadows – walking towards me.

I look behind me, waiting for someone to pull me back from the edge of the cliff.

No one comes.

hello, darkness.