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Compliments: Half-Hearted Versus Heartfelt

Everyone says that compliments are the key to making someone’s day better. Even if they’re just a “your shirt looks nice today”, they’re sure to brighten up the person’s face.

However, what if I told you that some compliments don’t? And that only specific heartfelt ones actually have some lasting effect?

We’ve all been guilty of handing out faint compliments. We tell people “nice clothes” or “nice work” when, in reality, we could care less about what they were wearing and what type of work they did. We’ve received our fair share of these half-hearted compliments as well, and I can personally say that the glowing effect lasted a minute and faded away.

Even still, don’t fret. There is only a little more work you have to put in to make your compliment a heartfelt one that will carry that person around on its back for the rest of the day.

  1. Mean what you say.

    People can detect when you’re lying. A compliment has to be true. It has to be something that you are actually admiring.
  2. Say the person’s name.

    All of a sudden, your compliment becomes something more intimate. It’s actually directed to that person, and that person knows you’re directing the compliment to them.
  3. Make your compliment specific.

    Don’t say good job. Say, “Wow! Your writing on that article made my day, insert name.” Name the effect of the job well-done on you, or name what made it specifically a good job. Name what you felt made you want to give that compliment. The more specific your compliment is, the better.
  4. It can be used as a conversation starter!

    Stick around. Don’t leave after giving the compliment and brush yourself on the back. Continue the conversation on that job well-done or on that piece of clothing that person was wearing. Inquire more into how the person did the job, or where the person got the clothing. It makes the compliment seem much more heartfelt, and we show the person on the receiving end that we are going to stick around to hear their answer.

Those are a few ways you can make your compliment seem more heartfelt! While number 4 does not necessarily have to be done, it is a good way to start a conversation, especially if you are not a social butterfly, like me.

Lots of love, and, insert name, I love what you are wearing today because the color just looks fab on you,



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