Recently, one of my soccer teammates secretly told me that she was leaving the team. She was one of my best friends on my team, and the person that I hung out with the most. So, naturally, I was devastated.
I am someone who does not deal with change very well. I am someone who worries a lot, a “worry-wart” if you will. For instance, when my friend told me she was leaving, my first thought was “then who am I going to talk to now?” It’s my fear of being left out that constantly nips me in the back of my heel, but that is a different post for another time.
Change is something that is inevitable. No matter what you do, it cannot be avoided. And, like everything, there are good changes and bad changes. What really helps lessen the blow of these changes is how you deal with them.
- Acknowledge that things are changing.
Denial is powerful, powerful enough to push ourselves into a little corner where we just close our eyes to the outside world. However, denying ourselves this vision often leaves us more stressed than not. So, it’s just better to come out and say the change like it is.
I will start first. My friend is leaving the team. (I know this sounds trivial but just humor me, alright?)
- Vent. To a point.
Vent to someone. Anyone. Anything. The best place to vent is a support group or to a friend. For me, I like to write these changes down, and tell about how stupid it is and why does it have to happen. However, don’t just keep venting. Think about ways you can make things better. How can you find the positives in the situation?
- Keep up your regular schedule. And your exercising.
Exercising will help lower your stress and reduce chances of depression, etc. Furthermore, having a regular schedule reminds us that not everything has changed. They provide grounding for us, to remind us that there are things that are still the same. Besides, having a regular schedule allows for no stress because you do not have to think about what you have to do. Instead, you just have it written down for yourself.
- Eat healthy.
When I am stressed, I eat carbs. Carbs are known for causing a serotonin rush to the brain because it causes the body to produce more insulin, which causes another reaction (I learned this in psyche!). However, carbs are also unhealthy.
Others turn to alcohol or other substances under stress. Again, not healthy.
Ways to combat unhealthy eating during times of change includes writing down what you ate for each meal. It might make you want to take a step back and look again at your eating schedule. However, I don’t recommend this because it may start to make you feel negatively about eating the things you eat.
Instead, set a limit for yourself. Maybe only two snacks a day. No sweets all day. Only one glass of wine. This way, you don’t feel bad about the things you are eating, and you are eating healthier.
- Be proactive.
Look avidly for ways that you can reach this change head-on. Changes don’t happen instantaneously. You can know that change will be coming eventually. If you have a stressful presentation coming up, be proactive about it. Recite your presentation left to right, make yourself work out to cause that endorphin rush, and spend less time doing other things. Your priority is your presentation, and you do not want other things to get in the way.
Those are five ways to deal with change! Change happens everyday, good or bad, in the future or instantly. Oftentimes, change comes with stress. Stress comes with an upset stomach or mind. Thus, these five ways can be used to reduce this stress and allow you to face this change head on.
Lots of love,
P.S. I have personally found these steps to be helpful. For instance, during quarantine, I have set my limit at snacks to three a day. It’s helped.