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The Fundamentally Wrong Words to Say

It’s your fault.

It’s disgusting how humans, how people, love to put blame onto other people. It’s utterly demoralizing.

Recently, I was involved in a heated argument which quickly spiraled. And why did this argument start? One of the participants said it was my fault. I gave him the side-eye and he got upset.

Explain to me how giving someone a look can make someone so upset. Especially if that said person refused to move out of the way when another warned them that they were carrying something extremely hot.

It’s your fault.

No one, no one, I repeat, as the right to say it’s your fault to another person. The only right they have is to put the blame onto themselves. If you just want to make yourself feel better, leave. Get out. I don’t want to talk to a self-serving pig.

Putting the blame on others kills the other’s moral. It makes them feel as if they are worthless. As if they are failure. As if they’re inferior.

And what are you doing? You’re making yourself feel better. You’re making yourself feel superior.

It’s your fault.

What do I know about this?

It’s simply why I’m writing this post now. Because I struggle with these feelings. I’m still struggling with them.

I try to not put the blame on others. I pile the blame onto myself. Or I vent it out in my journal. I try to see things from the other’s perspective.

Yes, it is tiring. Yes, it makes me want to scream sometimes, but at least I’m not making myself feel better by demoralizing another person. It’s entirely stupid how you can blame someone because it moves the pressure off of you to another person.

So keep the blame to yourself. Focus on improving yourself. Don’t blame others for your mistakes. It’s never going to help you grow.

And that person who told me those three words? Well, he’s still staying the same old person. He’s nothing new, always the same. Stuck in the same harmful cycle over and over again.

It’s my fault. I’m sorry.

Lots of love, and keep the blame to yourself,

Jess

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